Often, in our busy lives, we tend to grab meals whenever and wherever we can! Whether it’s in the car on the way to the next thing or sitting in front of the television looking to be entertained. We were using paper plates and disposable plasticware whenever we could for convenience. I’ve even caught myself eating a meal while standing in the kitchen and preparing our next meal! Talk about multi-tasking!
This was never a thing for me while growing up. Dinner was a sacred family time. Mom always made sure dinner was near ready when my dad came in from work. Was she multi-tasking too? Eating lunch while preparing dinner? Maybe. I was usually in school or riding my bike in the neighborhood so I wouldn’t know. I did know that all eight of us kids better be close by when the call to the table came. We sat together at that big dinner table, each in our usual spot.
Restaurants were for special occasions
We didn’t go out to eat on a regular basis like a lot of us do today. Fast food restaurants were just making their debut in our town. When we went out to eat, it was special. It was because our grandparents came to town, or a friend from far away was visiting. One memory I have is of the pizza parlor we went to. The table with its red and white checked tablecloth, the smell of pizza dough with tomato sauce, and the tiffany styled lamps that read Coca-Cola are still vivid. We all felt so special. Dad gave us a stern warning before we went into that pizza place. “No running around,” he said, “and eat what you take.” I can count on one hand the number of times we went out to a restaurant as a family.
We were not a grace-saying family, but we all waited until dad filled his plate and began passing the serving dishes around. Then, we talked. We laughed. We ate. There was also serious business discussed and scolding that happened at that table. There was love, and discipline at the same time. We were taught social graces, “Take your elbows off the table” “Use a fork, not your fingers” and “Don’t talk with food in your mouth.” We connected, with our parents and with each other.
Getting back to the table
I’ve been making it a point to get us back to the table. To get the family together, share meals, and make memories. The table isn’t always the actual dining table, sometimes it’s the picnic table outside or everyone in the same room on tv trays. Or on Sundays, when everyone is over, it counts that we are all in the same house! I also quit with the paper plates. They were lending to the extra casual, in-a-hurry feel of speed eating.
Now we eat on real plates and use real forks. We actually talk. We share about our days, our goals, and our dreams. And we praise each other and sometimes tease. Someone always tells a joke. There is always the loud eater and the picky eater. But it doesn’t matter because we are doing it together. Memories are made when gathered around the table. Like the time there was a fight over the last wonton. Or the time milk spurted out of someone’s mouth because of laughter.
We are reconnecting, learning about Grandpa’s job, or what happened at school that day. It may seem insignificant, but the 20 to 30 minutes we spend at the table are the best moments of my day. Even when the time it took to prepare the meal was much longer than the time spent sharing it.
Now, we say grace
Family time is what shapes us. I’m blessed that all of my kids and grandkids are here in the same city as I am. I have grandkids that live in my home, they are the ones I cook for (besides their grandpa and me.) They are the reasons that making new memories became a priority. I wanted them to be able to look back on this part of their lives and see the good that came of it.
The most important part though is now we say grace. We take turns. The kids learn to bless their food and offer thanks at the table. We acknowledge that God provides. That He is in our midst.
Do you have meals together as a family? It doesn’t have to be dinner time, it could be whatever time of the day works best for all. I challenge you to start making it a priority in your home. It may seem chaotic at first, but in time, your family will also be saying grace together.
Luke 24:30 When he was at the table with them, he took bread, gave thanks, broke it, and began to give it to them.